It’s the middle of summer. We wake in the morning wondering what to wear to the picnic at the park with family, or which swimsuit to take along for a weekend at the beach, or what heels to wear to show off our freshly painted pedicure. We are enjoying the sun and living in the moment until we open our favorite fashion magazines then, we are reminded that it is time to start thinking ahead to autumn, winter or even next summer.
That is the how the fashion industry is, it’s always looking ahead to the future (while we are in the stores purchasing the latest high heel trend of summer 2010, that same designer has already released sketches of the fall 2011 heels).
We as women, should imitate this philosophy also. Sometimes, we spend so many moments worrying about our past we tend to lose focus on the future (I will admit, letting go of the past is sometimes truly difficult especially, when it will not let you go so you can move forward). We never want to forget our past or pretend something never had happened because the experiences we have helped us gain the wisdom we need to walk fiercely to our future.
Remember, when one door closes, one experience has been lived, and one road comes to an end it is time to search for the next.
Here are four hindrances to let go of . . .
Old Love
You were dumped and your heart is broken. Deep inside, you know that you are a wonderful person. That someone better will come along, who will give you the real love you deserve but, yet and still, you tend to hold on to the pain for weeks and even months. You lay in bed crying your eyes out and wondering what is wrong with . . me. Nothing is wrong so, don’t change a thing (if you are doing so to impress another. If you are making changes because you want to be better for yourself then by all means proceed).
What you can do. . . is remove that person from your heart and your mind. How? Go ahead and mourn the relationship’s demise (do not spend months doing so), accept the end of the relationship, embrace the moment of joy it brought you, and then release the relationship and that person from your heart.
If that means removing all reminders of them from your home, destroying pictures and love letters, and never having contact with that person again then, that is what you must do. This will enable you to welcome the potential of true love into your life in the future.
Mistakes
We have all made them. It is human nature. As long as we live and breath we will do or say something wrong. As the saying goes, we live and learn. When we make a mistake there is usually some underlying consequence we suffer and we are definitely taught some kind of lesson or moral that we should apply to our lives.
The saying, however, is not we live and keep punishing ourselves for years afterward.
Stop punishing yourself. Take some time to reflect on the mistake made. Ask yourself what lesson have you learned? How have you grown from this experience? Finally, tell yourself, “Yes, I made a mistake, next time I am faced with that situation, I will . . .” and then begin to walk a new path with a fresh start.
Childhood
We were all children who grew up raised by imperfect adults. Some of us had great childhood. A childhood filled with love. Some received everything their heart desired and some couldn‘t. Others had a rough childhood and suffered pain no child should experience. Now, we are grown-up. For better or worse, our childhood has molded us into the person we are today, however it does not dictate who we are tomorrow. If someone suffered abuse, as a child, it has to be stopped from crossing over into our adult life. If you are staying in an abusive relationship because it is what you know or if you are continuing the cycle of abuse onto your child . . please, please seek help. Let the vicious cycle of abuse end with you.
If you were a child use to having your way and everything handed to you on a silver platter, welcome to adulthood. Quickly accept that is not how the real world works.
No one is going to give you want you want. You will have to work for it. Also, your co-workers, friends, and mate are really tired of your tantrums and whining. Grow up.
Fear of the past
Do not allow the fear of your past to keep you from reaching out for your future. Do not allow the pain, mistakes, or failures of the past to hinder you from trying once more. Don’t allow the heartache to keep you from loving again. Go forth wand walk fiercely in your fabulous heels toward your dreams.
